Let’s play a new game. I call it the creating game. Now it may feel a little funny at first, and not necessarily true, but stay with me for a moment.
Our habit is often one of recreating the past. We do this in the name of truth-telling. Actually, we do it for many reasons. For me, it’s been about the truth. Righteously living in search of the truth.
What I’ve noticed is living that truth just brings me more of what I already have. “It’s really hard to wake up at 5 a.m. every morning.” And what happens? I continue to experience how hard it is. I’m telling a limiting story. A story that’s in the past. (Those of you who’d like to argue for the limiting story, just play along.)
It’s not very fun.
Fun. I’ve been given the life assignment to follow fun. That’s where I thrive, so I’ve been told. Fun. Not truth. And the truth is subjective to the viewer anyway. Maybe that’s why I’ve been feeling so frustrated lately.
Also, when I feel good, all the crap in life drifts away. It doesn’t matter where I am, what I am doing, what I have—when I feel good, I am not in denial of of the things that don’t feel good. I can recognize them, accept how I feel about them. I just don’t feed them my energy (or talk about it to everyone I meet in hopes of getting some relief). I let them drift away while I bring my attention to what else is also present — joy. Sitting meditation is quite similar to this. Noticing what may be unpleasant and allowing them to be and to also drift away.
Freedom (from all the crap) used to be my heart’s deepest desire. Now my heart’s desire is feeling good. It’s kinda the same thing, but feeling good feels a bit closer. I can choose it, one baby step at a time. Does this feel good? Yes, go this way. No, what would feel just a tiny bit better right now? Go that way.
Conditioning may tell you that this is irresponsible. That you need discipline and to stay on track to reach your goals. Last week I wrote about discipline as an act of self-love. This kind of discipline is a choice that feels good. The other kind, where you get beat up for something, not so good. Feeling good will take you where you want to go, and maybe you’ll get to stop along the way to stare at the clouds, for a whole afternoon. And maybe that will inspire you to eat some ice cream. And that will make you so happy you remember how glorious it is to be alive and you take a long walk. And that helps you to sleep deeply that night and you awake refreshed and energized for the day. And you get way more done that you thought possible and it’s easy, cause it feels good. And maybe confusing at first, but don’t worry, this strange new feeling will become your new normal and then you will desire more.
Living in creating mode may not feel like the truth (as I’m used to telling it), but if I’m creating the future with my choices now, isn’t the truth what I’m creating? It’s what I’m living into vs. recreating the past with my constant retelling of it.
So I start my practice with you, here today.
I’m feeling pretty good right now. Inspired. Excited. I love this feeling bubbling up in me. Co-creating and connecting with so many beautiful and powerful creators. I just finished writing a children’s book and I’m excited to release it into the world. To share what I love (mindfulness, joy, curiosity) with kids (and adults) in a fun and playful way. Connecting with kids is one of my gifts and being a writer has long been one of my dreams, bringing the two together feels like coming home. And it’s fun and easy. Yes, you heard that right, my life is fun and easy and abundant. Money practically falls into my hands. I love when that happens, and clarity, so much clarity and confidence. It just feels good to be me.
How about you? What are you creating? Remember: you cannot do it wrong and you’ll never get it (all) done. There’s always more. Isn’t it what we all want anyway…just a little more (time, money, fun, joy, growth, experiences)? What are ya gonna do when you get it all done anyway? Maybe do that now.
Today’s post was inspired by family and the work of Abraham/Hicks, both whom I love and hold deep appreciation for.